A new brand of beauty
...what is this all about you ask?
It's really quite simple: I am frustrated seeing beautiful women like yourself struggling to fit into our tiny definition of what beauty is and what beauty "should" look like. Beauty has many faces, many angles, many depths and layers.
It pains me a great deal to see perfectly able, beautiful, smart, capable, talented women all over the world feel like they aren't good enough because of these marginalized standards of what is considered beautiful...WTF?!?!
We ARE good enough.
We just need a different definition of beauty and sexy. Hence,
Philosoxy was born.
THE BIRTH OF A WORD
Philosoxy was born one day when I was analyzing how far I had come from being a young insecure, not-very-pretty girl that totally disliked herself and got into really bad relationships and made very bad choices because of it, to the woman I am today - so completely happy being me that nothing can really alter my state (and if it does, I can gracefully navigate through it).
I analyzed everything in our pop-culture that we were labelling sexy, hot and beautiful and realized that it was all so void of any substance. Then when I started asking men and women what ultimately made someone sexy to them, the consensus was that sexiness did not necessarily come from just their looks but came from something more.
Let me ask you something; how many times have you met someone that wasn't considered hot, beautiful or sexy yet when you got to know who they were, their sense of humour, their ideas, their thoughts, their wisdom... they suddenly became so desirable, hence sexy?
Or conversely, you went out with a super hot guy or girl yet they were entirely void of anything interesting to say and had such shallow values and ideas that they became ugly very quickly.
This got me thinking; so we aren't beautiful or sexy because of our hair or size of our boobs or the gap between the thighs...etc, we are beautiful and sexy because of the multidimensional beings that we are!!! Ah ha! Well, no fucking wonder no one feels "good enough' to fit into our tiny definition of what beauty is; it's an impossibility. We are more than just the shell of our body. We can't, by nature of our being, just be hot. We have brains, we have wisdom, we have hearts AND we have bodies. We need a new word!!
Hence Philosoxy was born. A beautifully sexy multidimensional human being! Wow, what a concept. We are ultimately our sexiest, most desirable selves when we live in balance of our whole being - heart, body, smarts and wisdom. What if all 4 aspects of who you are aren't in balance? Don't fret my sexy friend, you've come to the right place. This is what being Phx'd is all about - living from all 4 aspects of who you are and being balanced, happy, cool, thoughtful, kind and free!
PHILOSOXY THE WORD
Since it's your personal philosophy that makes you sexy, PHx is comprised of 2 words, you guessed it: philosophy + sexy. It's pronounced: fi - LAH - suk - see
The abbreviation is PHx, like a fix or fixation.
Well no fucking wonder no one feels "good enough" to fit into our tiny definition of what beauty is; it's an impossibility. We are more than just the shell of our body. We can't, by nature of our being, just be "hot."
No one will ever become their whole selves by being a slave to others' definition of who you must be.
For the first 20 years of my life, I never felt good enough. I wasn't pretty enough, sexy enough, smart enough, tall enough, talented enough, capable enough, charitable enough, rich enough, empathetic enough, driven enough...and the list goes on and on. I really believed all of this. I was also raped as a young girl, bullied, made fun of, moved endless amounts of times, never planted roots, had a failed suicide attempt, I was manipulated, scammed and was bankrupt - emotionally, financially, physically and soulfully.
Then one day, things changed. I went to a 10-day silent meditation retreat. Slowly, my life started to change. I went from feeling empty in all aspects of my life, to having an immense amount of zest for life. I went from defining myself based on other's terms, to fully in control of who I wanted to be. I became free. I became me.
I realize now that I had not been given the correct tools to navigate life. I had been living on auto-pilot based on the teachings or things others did or said. I never actually considered my life and my needs, until I did. And that changed everything.
Today I am happy with my wrinkles and with my tummy that never really got flat again after having a child. I am in love with my life and curious about the world. I am in gratitude with the beauty and wonder that we create when we do it consciously, and I whole-heartedly think I am beautiful...or rather Philosoxy. I am free!
You too are meant to be free. You are meant to have success, happiness, love, abundance and all of those great things. You get this by living what I call a PHx'd Life. And what that basically is, is you excavating you - what works for you based on who YOU are, not one general mold of who you should be. No one will ever become their whole selves by being a slave to others' definition of who you must be.
I want for you to be free. I want for you to be happy. I want for you to live a PHx'd life full of journal writing moments and with tools to navigate those journal-scratching moments. I want to offer you those tools to navigate this life because we only have one and life's too short to not feel good enough.
With Love & Kindness,
MY STREET CRED
If you're one of those people that need credentials (I am not but since I am here for you it's totally fair if you want to know what I've got), here they are:
I believe life is best learned through experiences, I have many MANY of those
I have never been fearful of living
I have spent the last 20 years contemplating the beauty of our brains and souls
I am mildly obsessed with human behaviour and what makes us tick, anything about psychology is my thing
I have devoted large amounts of time to spirituality and philosophy
The study of Buddhism and meditation is also my thang
I studied pyschology in college / university
I am certified as a NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) Practitioner, CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) Practitioner, and a Mindfulness Practitioner
But most importantly, for the last 20 years of my life I have lived with passion, I have danced like no one is watching, I have cried with the depths of my soul, I have learned many life lessons, I have laughed to tears, I have been silly to no comprehension, I can honestly say I have a circus-mind, I have lived in the perfection of gratitude, I have been honest to a fault, I am humble and have been humbled, I love unfathomably, and I have fun every.day.of.my.life. I want this for you sooooooooo badly. Life is too short to not feel good enough. I know, I have been there. ❤